Couples Counseling

Dallas Therapy Collective

Has your romance faded away?

 

When your relationship started everything seemed so perfect. You remember holding hands while driving down the road. You talked for hours, yearning for more. You had to pinch yourself to know it wasn’t a dream. You felt connected in ways that you never imagined possible. Emotionally, physically, and mentally – you two were on fire! You excitedly planned for your future and life together felt unstoppable.

But somewhere along the way, something changed. Now everything he says annoys you. Her quirks that you used to find attractive are now a turn off.  Every conversation is laced with conflict and confusion. Why is everything so tense? It just seems like that connection is gone and you don’t know how to get it back.

Sometimes you ignore it and go into auto-pilot. After all, what good would it do to sit around and critique the relationship that you’ve invested so much of your life in? However, late at night when you’re having trouble sleeping, your brain wakes you up nagging at you with questions like…

What happened? Why does it seem like we are strangers? Can this relationship be saved? Am I going to end up alone again?

People evolve… 

and so do relationships

It is normal to feel lost and even unprepared for the complications of relationships with others. We like stability and consistency. However, people change. You are not the same person you were when you two met and neither are they. We don’t always realize how different we are from way back when. This often means that relationships need a little re-calibrating.

Of course you are grieving your relationship as it has shifted. Humans are built for relationships, for sharing ourselves with others. We want to see and be seen. And yet we are all different. We come from different backgrounds, have different experiences, and we learn to love in different ways. We all want our connections with our loved ones to feel seamless and natural and we often don’t understand when relationships don’t work out that way.

We begin by learning about you. How do you approach others and how do you understand and communicate with others? What works for you and what doesn’t? Getting to know more about yourself can open up worlds of information about your interactions with others. You can learn to identify what makes you feel connected with others and what makes you shut down. Through exploring your relationship patterns, you can identify ways in which you contribute to your dynamics with your loved ones.

You might be wondering about couples counseling…

I’m not the problem. I just need to figure out how to get through to someone else. How can I get them to change?

The most important thing about successful relationships is accepting that the only person you have any control over is yourself. As much as you might think that your relationship would be fine if only someone else would change, you have come here because you are probably already aware of the valuable time and energy you’ve lost waiting for that to happen. By learning about your patterns and changing your approach, they entire dynamic can shift.

What if I don’t want this relationship anymore? What if I just want to leave?

That may be the case. You may be seeking support in making one of the most important decisions of your life. We’re here to help. While we are not here to give you advice or tell you what you should do, we can help you explore your options and support you in the process of finding what works best for you. Considering a life change such as ending a relationship is a big decision and you owe it to yourself to give yourself as much time and space as you need to explore you feelings, your needs, and your dreams for your life.

I just don’t know if we can open up to a stranger about the intimate details of our life and our relationship. You couldn’t possibly understand what I’ve been through or help me.

These are all valid questions and not uncommon for people to ask when they are thinking about seeing a therapist. You might be feeling particularly vulnerable and uneasy about sharing such an important part of yourself with a professional. Our staff members have experience working with people dealing with difficult relationships and struggling with important decisions. There may be many factors contributing to your relationship difficulties, like past or current trauma or abuse, cultural identity factors, or other mental health issues. Our trained and experienced therapists will work in collaboration with you to develop a treatment plan that best fits your needs.

You can heal 

in your relationship

Couples often seek couples counseling and marriage counseling. At Dallas Therapy Collective, we address couples issues with a holistic perspective. We will help you examine your relationship style, communication style, and the dynamics between you and your partner. Your therapist will gather a thorough background of your relationship and collaborate with you and your partner to make recommendations that fit your unique situation.

Meet Our

 Couples Counseling Specialists

*Note: Our couples counselors are all out-of-network. Thanks!

Emily Messick, LPC

Emily Messick, LPC

Lauren Spivack, LMFT

Lauren Spivack, LMFT

Zonia Huerta, LPC-Associate

Zonia Huerta, LPC-Associate